From this day forward - a day to remind us all what weddings are really all about...

I go to a LOT of weddings! Of course, as a wedding photographer, you'd kind of expect that, but even in a year where weddings have taken a back seat to social distancing, I've managed to attend over twenty, which is, I think you would agree, a fair few considering the challenges 2020 has presented.

Every wedding has it's unique, memorable moments, but just last week I was invited to capture a very special occasion, one in which the vows, particularly one poignant line, had me thinking long and hard about the true essence of a wedding and how that meaning is sometimes lost in the hustle and bustle of "big" weddings.

Vicky & Ross are a mature couple who were married at home, on a Tuesday in a northern suburb of Brisbane surrounded by a handful of family and friends, but joined by guests from across the world via Zoom.  Now, none of that is in anyway unusual, especially in the middle of this pandemic, however, they did have to bring the wedding forward a couple of weeks. And the reason for that, and why a particular line in the vows struck me so deeply, is why this story is so important.

You see, the reason they had to bring the wedding forward is that Ross has a terminal illness. The wedding took place at home because that is where he has chosen to spend his final days. What I witnessed though, on this incredibly sad, yet utterly joyous day convinced me that we have to look long and hard at the way we celebrate weddings going forward. We have become far too obsessed with the material aspects of the day, not the words two people say to one another during the ceremony or what those words actually mean.

All you need to have had for a completely successful wedding day is a warm glow and piece of paper that says you are legally married to someone you love with all your heart - everything else is just fluff. Yes, some photos of the day are a wonderful reminder, especially if you choose to say "I do" in a beautiful place, but all the rest, the outfits, the cars, the flowers, even the party, are all just unnecessary accoutrements we have come to believe we need. But it isn't really what we need or what is important. What's important is the commitment you are making to another person, and that is what is getting lost in the whole industry that surrounds weddings today.

So please, when you are planning your wedding, and especially when you're writing your vows, just take a few moments to think about how it might feel if the person  you were saying 'till death us do part' only had a few days left to live and you might begin to realise how nothing else but the time you spend together actually matters...